This last week I’ve been packing up my life in my condo as I will be moving soon. Being the little dippoop that I am, I decided to procrastinate the whole time and somehow stumbled on videos of David Spade doing interviews. If you’ve never watched David Spade in interviews, like me 3 days ago, you’re going to be in for quite a treat. HE IS HILARIOUS!!!
In an interview he did with Ellen, he discussed her star studded birthday party and said that celebrities were packed there like sardines…
… and that’s how I got my idea for this week … STARDINES
p r o d u c t:
Stardines is the most star studded charity event that stars are literally squished together like sardines!!! Plebs can also come to meet their favourite celebs for a large sum of $$$$. After all, all of the proceeds will be going to preserving aquatic life.
c o n c e p t:
We ALL know that the Vanity Fair Oscar Party is THE place to be if you’re anybody worth knowing. They must have mixed up my address the last few years and that’s OBVIOUSLY why I haven’t been invited. Why not have a star studded event where proceeds are all donated to charity? This could be the new Met Gala. Of course, this event as it is a marine pun would be dedicated to raising awareness over the human impact on marine life.
I mean if you haven’t heard about the controversy with plastic straws these days, I must ask you, where have you been??? With the habits we have where we are constantly purchasing more and more things and discarding more and more things, we really aren’t doing our lovely Earth any favours. We see viral videos on our newsfeeds of people getting a straw out of a turtle’s nostrils, but then we still continue to trash our oceans. So how do we fix this?
Some people would rather volunteer than donate money, but I ask you this. Are you willing to go to the Ocean and pick up trash? Do you have the time and are willing to take on that opportunity cost (EHHHH BUSINESS MAJOR HERE!!!)?
If not then you should come to Stardines and dine with the stars where you know your donations are going somewhere that counts.
There are many celebrities out there that I think would be great candidates to act as ambassadors for this event. My two frontrunners are Leonardo Di Caprio and the Amphibian Man from “The Shape of Water.”
So why these two choices?
- Leonardo Di Caprio – He has a close connection with the ocean, I mean he was on the titanic and floated in the Ocean for a while. Was that an insensitive comment from myself? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ He’s also well known for being a huge environmentalist and has his own foundation that is dedicated to the wellbeing of Earth’s inhabitants.
- Amphibian Man from “The Shape of Water” – This man literally lives in open waters. He’s seen this trash up front and personal. HE HAS PERSONAL STORIES on how we human beings are pure trash with our trash. He can also breathe out of water for some periods of time so he can make a nice celebrity appearance at Stardines. Also tumblr girls are in love with him and his butt so with his celebrity status and dedicated fandom we can definitely raise a lot of money.
What do you think of my choices of ambassadors? Do you think this event could be bigger than the Met Gala?
Let me know ~